Monday, October 5, 2009

I'm dreaming of a white... OCTOBER?

Wait, it's not supposed to snow the first week of October. Doesnt it know it's supposed to be beautiful until October 30th, so we're all excited thinking this year we wont have to freeze going trick-or-treating, just to be disapointed the night before? It's tradition!

I started watching conference at my house, on my computer. But my computer's old. And it didnt like the streaming video. And although I have a tv, it's downstairs, and it doesnt get any reception down there. (I REALLY HATE that there's no spell check on the new layout. I'm really tempted to go back to the old post-thing just for that. I could type my posts in Microsoft Word, but that's so much work. So y'all are just going to have to deal with the fact that my spelling's getting worse and worse.) Anyway, no conference downstairs. And a pain to watch on my outdated computer. So, Saturday night, I went to my grandma & grandpa's house. And stayed there 'til monday morning. And lo an behold, monday morning, I wake up and look out her window. And HOLY COW! For those of you who don't know my where my grandparents live, they have the PERFECT view of the Tetons outside their kitchen window. Artists have set up shop in their yard, just to capture the perfect view. But ... well look for yourself...

What happened to the Tetons? They've vanished! And although the Tetons have disapeared, this pic doesnt do the snow justice. Check out my car!

About 6 inches. And this was 8 in the morning! And it was still snowing. By the time we left at 11, it was completely covered again.  That's my dear ol' Grandpa. I think he's having fun. We got B all bundled up to go out to "help" and he just laughed.

It's kind of an irony having Grandma's cacti in the foreground...

And of course, with this much snow (and it being fairly wet), you just have to make a snowman! So, we'd like to introduce B's first ever snowman. 'cept she's a woman. see the long hair? (it's a small garbage bag)

she's got little marmelade sample bottle lids for eyes, and the marmelade bottle for a nose (afterwards, Grandpa pulled out carrots we could have used. oh well) And what else would you use as suprize snow snowman arms? Corn stalks left in the garden, of course!

B wanted to make more (of course! there's a whole yard full of snow. What else would you do?) but I had to get home so I could get back to work.

The snow didnt want to roll into balls. It was a little too powdery for that. So we had to use the piling method. WE made a mound and then just kept building it up. we tried to make a ball for the head, and man, it took work! But for a first snowman, er, woman, it's not bad!

I was smart enough to make B bring a coat, but I didnt think she'd need gloves! It wasnt supposed to snow. And of course, when it snows you have to play in it! So these are some of "Great Grandma's" gloves. They didnt want to stay on. But with the excitement of the first snow, B didn't care!

I dont know if I regret my actions...

****this is not the origional post. I've deleted it.****

So, I feel differently this morning. I don't really care how he feels or what he's doing. He can mess up his own life. And although I shouldn't judge, I don't regret rebuking him. My friend helped me feel better. She told me to stop beating myself up. I cant take it back, and if I hadn't actually expresed my feelings, I would have regretted it. Even if it does strain the already strained relationship. Even if it does cost more because we are dueling it out with lawyers. I said what I felt. For the first time this whole estrangement. Granted, I've started to tell him what I thought. And I had told him how I felt in reguards to how great he was, etc. But I never actually told him about how much I feared where he was heading.

And I'm back to not wanting him back. I know I go through cycles. And although its probably annoying for all of you who have to listen to me in my various cycles, they are healthy. They are normal. And although I may slip back into the wanting him back phase, this is the strongest I've felt for NOT wanting him back.

I just keep thinking of Pahoran. (Alma 60-63. You'll have to click the "next" for the other chapters). And the scripture about the guilty taking the truth to be hard.  I know I'm not Nephi, or Moroni. And if he pointed out my weaknesses or failings, I'd be ticked (and therefore no better), but I can't help but thinking of how his response speaks. And it makes me even MORE determined NOT to want him back.

Friday, October 2, 2009

my poor, poor garden

So, remember this post? (about my garden). Ever wonder how it went? Well... let's just say I'm not really that good at growing things. Well, I take that back. I grow things, but it's usually on accident. Somehow things grow, even with my negligence. For instance, I have a plant in my kitchen that probably only gets watered once a month... but it's still alive. perhaps not thriving (because I don't think it's really growing) but it's green. And it looks healthy. And it's not just plants. When I was 14, we had this fish. There wasn't anywhere to put it in our house, so I got to keep it in my room. And I was in charge of feeding it. Poor thing. I meant to, I swear. I wasn't negligent on purpose! But that fish only got fed about once a week. And the thing lived! for a whole year. And then we moved and it ("mysteriously") didn't follow us. I did feed the cats, though. Didn't neglect them. ... and they died. hm.... I'm starting to worry about my sweet child...

Anyway, better get back to my garden... like I say, I didn't do to well with it. But I knew I'd be busy this summer, and I didn't have any high hopes for it, because, lets face it, I was proud of myself just for PLANTING it! I didn't think anything would actually GROW!

But it did, and I showed off my pics. And then the peas were ripe for picking right as I headed up home for Jake and Sarah's (My bro and now-sis) wedding. So they didn't get picked. And same with the Green beans. I picked 'em when we got back, but they were all over-ripe, hard, and wrinkly. Mom calls 'em grandpas, but they were more like great-grandpas. So, no peas, and about a serving of green beans were salvageable. We had TONS of lettuce. TONS. Problem was, we also had TONS of nasty disgusting earwigs IN the lettuce (the lettuce was fine, just washed REALLY well. And the earwigs met their demise. As for beets and carrots?

This is it. The biggest carrot's about 3 1/2 inches. (there are more carrots than what shows up, they're just on the bottom.) And the biggest beet's about 2" in diameter. Maybe 3. And this is our ONE squash. It's supposed to be a summer squash, I think, but I just barely picked it. It's tiny. OK, not bad. Normal, even. But Compared to the HONKIN' zucchini and squash I've been given, it looks kinda pitiful.

The cucumbers never grew. The bugs ate the starts, and they never grew after that. And the peppers never even sprouted. Neither did the onions. Probably too cold. Or not enough sunshine. And the radishes grew... they just went to seed before they ever got bulbs.

Here are our pumpkins. They're still green. But It's freezing now, so we've decided to let them ripen in our house. The one didn't like it's stem... oops.

as for our tomatoes? well, they're still on the vine. I've been covering them every night. I should probably just pick them and let them ripen in the house, too. but they're all still green. Mom says pull the whole plant up and bring them in to let them ripen, but I'm leary of that... I'm sure she's right, I just don't want to.
so my notes to self: next year, plant sooner. And actually WATER the garden! (I'm a genius. To think, it took a whole summer to come up with that...) And if I have a wedding, either pick the garden BEFOREHAND or have someone else pick it for me. And I'm not starting my tomatoes outside. I'm gonna either start 'em in the house, or buy the starts. And probably the same for the peppers. And I'm not gonna plant so much lettuce. maybe more beats, instead. because I didnt even have enough to bottle. Course, if they GREW, maybe there would have been enough... Also, I liked the Ruby Queen beets over the Detroit Dark Red, because they actually bulbed, instead of staying like straight sticks. I liked the combo of both lettuces together, so I'll still plant both of them next year.
Oh, and next year, don't let the Priests mow over my rhubarb. That's on the list, too. ;c)